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Tactics to avoid burn-out/boredom for male expatriates in Pattaya.
Well, you’ve finally done it, you’ve survived being run-over in divorce court, sold off your property, tied up your affairs and finally have made the bold action of moving to Thailand. But what happens after the first year when the thrill and exotica of the bar/club scene fades and your daily stress level drops to almost nil? Yes, we no longer have to worry about morning commutes, finding suitable female companionship or the cost of living. The crime level, while it is present is much lower than in most Western urban cities. So that means a man’s life should be totally care and worry-free, correct? Most men don’t seem to realize that human existence is naturally prone to angst and problems despite living in the paradise that is Pattaya. I see some men simply living from one “happy hour” to the next, drowning all their problems in drink and sex and avoiding all real thoughts about their life or mental state. Too much partying and fun can lead to those activities becoming stale and having one’s outlook on life verge on boredom which can lead to becoming depressed. Living in a relaxed society like Thailand where eccentrics are tolerated can encourage such behavior. Then again I see some men taking care of themselves mentally and physically. They work out at the gym, do laps in the pool and moderate their consumption of drinking and fun. They find ways to occupy their time and engage those mental muscles. This seems to be a good path as it can lead to maintaining one’s mental health and perspective. It’s like that old Peggy Lee song, “Is That All There Is?” Does any rational man want to simply do as James Dean said, "Live fast, die young, and leave a pretty corpse."? There’re some activities that one can do to exercise one’s mental capabilities and keep them sharp. Taking a Thai language course is one. It’s considered to be one of the hardest languages to learn as it’s tonal with five phonemic tones: middle, low, high, rising and falling. It can take years to master. The alphabet has 44 characters derived from the Khmer alphabet script. Learning Spanish is a walk in the park by comparison. There are simple things to do like reviving the lost art of conversation. Years ago men would gather together in groups to discuss the matters of the day and listen to war stories and jeremiads. There was no “one-ups-man-ship”, put-downs or snide remarks. Points were politely disagreed with as men were allowed to speak their minds. In this fashion misconceptions were corrected, new information gained and camaraderie between men was strengthened. Nowadays few men even bother to talk, most seem to stick to their own familiar groups and keeping their conversations shallow and surface. A man can simply gather a group of male friends that he knows well and have meetings not involving clubbing or bar-hopping in a coffee shop or even by the beach. The ground rules would be no power trips, ridicule or spite, mutual respect is paramount and every man would have his say without interruption. A few topics could be chosen to discuss ahead of time if need be. The last time I participated in one I was stimulated and refreshed by hearing different perspectives, viewpoints and having my preconceived notions challenged. Taking one’s leisure time to read classics and other well-written books like “Stillwell and the American Experience in China” or “The Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire”. Subscribing to an on-line library like “Digital Library” or Literature.org is one way to access rare books that one can’t find in the used bookstore. http://www.literature.org/ Journal-writing is another activity that can be easily done and the results stored on-line. It’s amazing how much self-improvement and perspective on one’s life a man can gain if one does this and then looks back at past writings. Volunteering to teach English is another way to put something back into the community and host country while gaining respect and insight into the Thais. The state of education in LOS (Land of Smiles) is pretty dismal with poor spelling and grammar in abundant evidence on signage and such. Doing something positive like teaching English helps both the teacher and the student. Teaching something like English is a good way to learn and improve one’s own grammar and spelling leading to improved thinking and communication with one’s fellow Farangs. Submitted by : Claw 11-June-06 Related Story - Golfing Around Pattaya Thai Live Pop Music in Pattaya
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